Well, it is a virtual repeat of my last – Sarge is off again for a final leg on the border. His hotel, sadly, is not the same which is irksome – one of them catered to the midnight shift with proper blinds, housekeeping hours, etc. Ah, well…
I’ve been a bit quiet today – the first night alone in the bed is a restless one and especially when a dog decides it has to take a constitutional at 1a. I have decided this evening will be edited via wine so that I can sleep. I hope.
It has been a hectic time – my father (who is aged but spry) has moved to Texas. We took him shopping for the misc goods that he didn’t fit in his 3 suitcases. While he is with a sibling for now I suspect that arrangement will end before long. I don’t know how he will find a new place that is the same as his old one – not a lot of senior housing, frankly – and I am betting we’ll have to put an RV on the property before long. There is room for it and services so it isn’t a terrible hardship. I just fear a tumble while we’re away. I suppose we could have him stay in the house to keep him on one floor and a bit safer…
Anyway, being with him was strange – it wasn’t a “visit” as it was in the past – this was a more permanent getting re-acquainted and I remembered bits and pieces of history. He sort of sucked as a Dad. Yeah…that’s a fair statement. He tried but his heart wasn’t in it by the time I came around. But…I inherited his intelligence. I have his love of music. We are, I think, more alike than the others. But I listened to him expounding as he is wont to do on all manner of topics and wondered what he must be thinking, knowing in his heart that these are the final few years left to him.
And what a world his eyes must see these days…what an ugly, fruitless, lost civilization. I take no responsibility for it, having raised no one that is currently tearing it apart. Not my circus. But it makes me glad that Ed passed long before now…what would he think of it all? He never believed in an After so I hope, for his sake, that what there might be is free of this worldly concern. He did have something to say about a statue, though, which seems timely. My GOD, I miss his words. I miss his mind.
I want to lay blame on many – but in the end there is no cure for what was done to two entire generations. The hippies had kids, spread the disease of socialism to them, and then those kids suckled their own on a more vicious version – not merely socialism but a kind of rabid, destructive narcissism that ensured the demise of any kind of introspection, of respect for others. Others simply do not matter – what they want (and they will find those who want the same and cling to them) is all they care about. The price is not even considered – hell, they’ve never paid with their own sweat for anything. But they will soon enough. They believe somehow that they will be the ones with the ladles at the cannibal pot. Oh, no – oh, fool. You will be dinner like the ones you tossed in. Later, maybe. Fatter, likely. But dinner all the same for those who knew you for the useful idiot you were.
I wonder sometimes how wide this whole plan wends – street skirmishes directed by local puppet masters who commune with their national directors. But from whence comes the orders? How high and far and why? Disorder, certainly. And with it the Need to Control the People. Save you, they’ll promise. Just sign here…but it will be a Declaration of Subservience. Who benefits? That has always been something I ponder – what motive and who benefits…so the U.S. is brought to her knees. Who comes in during the distraction? What nation wants this rabble? Or is it something akin to a known disaster pending and a need to have Civil War II to limit the population on the ground?
I don’t know…I do know that there is A LOT of money involved. A lot of professional agitators. And a select few who are quite versed in fomenting anarchy. For all the hackery these days you would think someone could get their hands on the real plans…instead they focus on the main character of the play. He has a script, fools. Who wrote the damned thing and who is hiring the actors? That is what I am curious about.
But instead I just try to stay a step ahead. Purchases made to make it through what might come. Books set aside. Others tossed to make room. My mind whirls with what is done and not done. What must be finished in time…already one can see the slow drivers – the gaze lingering a bit too long. I cannot blame them. I do the very same, truth be told. Because the day may come when all the fences are ignored. Those polite and staid fences of wood, wire, and good faith are ripped apart in a frenzy to just get what you have.
The cannibal pot will get low. The hungry will venture outward. There are not enough miles between you and them. Never enough miles. Perhaps it must be instead as in Luke 3:10 – “And the people asked him, saying: What then shall we do?” – and :11 “And he answering, said to them: He that hath two coats, let him give to him that hath none; and he that hath meat, let him do in like manner.” I don’t think it will go that way. But it never hurts to hope as long as you do so with clear eyes. Don’t mistake me for a devotee, though. Like Ed, I’ve my doubts. But I have read so many tales – all the same story over and over with different tongues to tell it that one has to wonder. And, after all, being kind has its time and place in every tragedy. It may be the only choice we get in the end…I hope we all make the right choice.