I see that Blogger wants to pressure me into doing something I shall not – upgrade, that is, in order to use it. Meh. I suppose I’ll have to try a do-over someplace else but for now we’ll see if this will suffice.
Life has been maddeningly busy the past month. A lot of prep for the TX Multigun event took Trooper’s time which left me everything else. Trooper RO’d the event (2:50m here) which was HUGE. I only went for a few hours on Sunday after his stage was shot by all and it was still uncomfortable for me. Too damn many people. I try to be supportive of Trooper’s shooting but I am not that a fan of the Open class hooey. (Exhibit A which made me laugh my ass off.) In this video @ 2:10m is the range that I was able to shoot in practice a few weeks ago. Fun as hell, I’ll admit, though glad I had the friends’ shotgun – kinder, gentler.
Anyway, it was 4 very long days for Trooper and it was only a few days later that the same friend experienced a robbery that astounded us…he’d been so tired, left things out of the safe that didn’t fit (that was resolved immediately after), and was only gone for a little while. Poor man…he has been so upset by it. We were off Friday so Trooper and I took him in the truck to the Home Depot, loaded up on new interior doors, new locks, and started hardening entries and ensuring the kids knew the changes would help keep them safe. If Trooper hadn’t had to work this weekend, we’d be there continuing the projects but he has family stepping in now to aid…no better, kinder, more generous guy, and absolutely not deserving this…
People are getting brave and will do now what they might not have even considered a year ago. We do not go anywhere without sufficient to get home again. We do not sit on a sofa without a way to make an intruder very unwelcome nearby. We take more time, now, to greet a neighbor – to gauge their intentions should things go badly. And we meet new people whose eyes also scan the horizon.
The horizon…I have listened again to the Audible version of Ed’s book (with Christina Olds) “Fighter Pilot“. The tales of life, war, of planes and friends, of politics, and of walking away from all that…and I found the DVD on Netflix of aerial combat wherein he is briefly featured, his voice and face thicker than in wartime, one reckons. Because I had a need to See the man…to put that life into a body. To learn that it was his budget analysis that permitted the SR71 to fly gave me a really deep startle. Links, and links within links, you see…there is something about all those wings – everpresent in every tale that stirs me, names that rode the winds aloft as known to me as family. Someday, I promise myself. Next go round, maybe, the wings won’t be merely an affection but an avocation.
The music today is a background sky driving my thoughts far and farther still…all my favorite tunes driving away the worries and irritations – that slow tide, as it were, pushing me to remember what has been…I’ve forgotten so much that the music reminds me of. I’ve still much to get done while he works a 12 hr shift but the heat keeps me inside and the memories bid me – play that movie, remember those days. Listen, listen, and those ghosts will walk again in those hallowed halls of the mind. The song plays and unwinds the story and I remember it all again.
Soon, the sun will arc a bit westward and provide a shady relief to permit the yardwork I must do. Trooper hasn’t the time and it is so out of hand…and the labor will surely relieve the melancholy. It always does. Hard work is a fine cure for nearly any ill of the spirit. If nothing else, it makes you grateful that it isn’t your daily lot in life.
And we wait, too, for the call from the east – his father in decline, it is only a matter of time. But they were not close, and many reasons keep him here. One trip, he says, and it can be to say goodbye or to bury him. The family will need more help with the latter, he thinks, so he makes that decision. It is not mine. But it will leave him the last in the lineage. And I feel a terrible guilt at that thought made plain. Unfair…damnably unfair.